Thursday, September 18, 2003
Toilet Talk
(...a nitpick.)
Increasingly of late I have noticed a small but annoying fallacy cropping up on the Web, in print and occasionally even on television. It is a minor inconsistency, but it bugs the helloutta me.
So obviously I must tell you about it.
Here is the hypothetical situation:
a) Someone is in the shower.
b) Someone else flushes a toilet.
c) The water temperature changes suddenly, freezing the person standing in the bathtub.
Right?
WRONG.
The water should scald, not freeze, the unsuspecting victim in the shower.
I should know. I have played this trick countless times on housemates back in college (and once or twice they even got me back).
There is a simple logic, perfectly accessible to the layman as well as the master plumber, as to why the water turns instantly hot and not cold. It is a basic equation. Now, pretend I'm Mr. Wizard and we'll all have some Fun With Plumbing Science:
First off, there is a certain amount of water en route to the shower in the pipes. Some of this water is hot (from the water-heater) and some is cold (direct from the water supply). The water comes out of the shower head as a mixture of hot and cold which produces the oh-so-comfortable warmth you enjoy when you bathe.
When you flush the toilet, the toilet tank must fill back up again. And the same pipes supplying water to the shower also fill the toilet tank. So, the toilet tank places a demand on the water flowing through the pipes, a demand which reduces the flow of water to the shower.
The question is, what kind of water flows into the toilet and out of the pipes? Hot or cold?
It is COLD.
Why?
BECAUSE HOT WATER HAS TO BE HEATED, HEATING WATER COSTS MONEY, AND NOBODY SANE PAYS MONEY TO PUT HOT WATER IN THE TOILET.
*ahem*
That would be flushing money, you see.
Common sense.
Thus, the refilling toilet tank reduces the amount of cold water in the mixture running into the shower, making the shower spray hotter, and therefore scalding the unsuspecting bather (who no doubt deserves it. I know I only did this to roommates I didn't like and I took only a mild delight in their screams. What am I, mean or something?)
Now, I'm not saying nobody heats the water in their toilets. Somewhere out there I am sure someone does. Maybe Donald Trump, who has money to burn and seems to be of a very mild, overly-civilised constitution... perhaps he fills his commodes with pleasantly warm H2O so that the occasional splash-back isn't so cold as to shock his soft pampered ass. Hell, he might have Perrier in his johns for all I know. Perhaps the bidets in Buckingham Palace are the same. Or the White House...
But in general, Who puts money in the toilet? That's all I'm sayin'.
And now I will sleep much better knowing I have cleared this up. Thank you. You can go back to what you weren't doing (but think about this the next time you flush.)
~
9/18/2003 10:17:00 PM
Wednesday, September 17, 2003
File Under: Nothing Changes
Carolyn Hammond, in the preface to her translation of Caesar's Gallic War, notes the following about life 2,000 years ago:
The drive to increase territorial holdings, high civilian as well as military casualties, and the predominance of economic motives for aggression--all these belong to an accepted norm of international activity...
~
9/17/2003 11:07:00 AM
Sunday, September 07, 2003
The Pen Is Mightier Than The Sword.
And lighter, too. Much less unwieldy. Much wieldier?
But the sword is really beautiful. Damn beautiful.
As beautiful as a human meat-cleaver can be, anyway. And that's all it is, isn't it?
I mean, that's the catch. It's just a butcher's knife for human flesh. Live human flesh, at that. Yet it's also a symbol of so much: an object of defense against adversity, tyranny, or evil; an inverted cross; the icon of honor, chivalry, and a simpler time; the soul of the warrior and the extension of his self...
...romanticized by art and literature throughout all of history...
Anyway, the pen may skewer your enemies, but the sword does a right final job of it.
~
Photo: It's not actually a photo. Just my cheap-excuse-for-a-scanner again.
9/07/2003 06:10:00 PM
Wednesday, September 03, 2003
Art Fact
What is it?
It's looking at you.
It's STARING at you!
IT WANTS TO BITE YOU!!
...I guess.
Okay...
...hell, I don't know...
~
9/03/2003 10:21:00 PM
Monday, September 01, 2003
Argybarple by Taz
Argy's new background and look is by the talented web-designer (and wonderful person) Taz, whose work I've been a fan of for quite some time. You can find her free Tile-a-Day at Citrus Moon or contact her at taz@citrusmoon.net .
I find Taz's deceptively simple tiles to be trippy and sublime, like the best abstract art*. Sure, the pattern and the colors first hit your eye, but then you realize there's something more, something undefinable... it might be a hint of movement like an optical effect, or maybe the motion caused by the colors interacting as if alive... or maybe it's the associations the tile brings to mind, like Navajo art or nature...
Anyway, sublime is the best word I can come up with. And it's not just because Taz thinks like me...
(Choosing which of Taz's tiles to link to nearly drove me nuts, so I ended up by impulsively grabbing a few favorites. Too much good stuff!)
*(And, speaking of abstract art, Taz lives in Thessaloniki, Greece, home of the incredible Stelios Mavromatis. Brilliant! )
~
9/01/2003 03:00:00 PM
